Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
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