I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
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