I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
you had me at cake vodka
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
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