I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
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Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
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let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Randomize