so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
Randomize
