I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
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