My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
