u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Tornado booty call.. dedication
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Randomize
