No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
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