that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Randomize