i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
