so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
Randomize
