Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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