did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!