I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.