I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
