Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
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