Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
She told me I should be a condom model.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
My ass is underappreciated
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
Randomize
