I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
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