According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
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