sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
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