atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
Randomize
