tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
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