the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Randomize
