sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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