u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize
