im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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