yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Randomize
