tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
Randomize
