White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
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