Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
