i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
