its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
23 Insane Reasons People Got Fired
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
These 31 Gross People Really Put The ‘Trash’ In ‘Trashed’
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped