So drunk, too bad you don't want this
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
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