Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
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