remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
Randomize
