Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
the day after is always just damage control
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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