Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
