dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
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