My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
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