Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
Randomize
