Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Impromptu road trip to New Orleans for four days of Mardi Gras. I'll probably be alive and back for Valentine's Day plans, probably won't stick my dick in some random either-might be using my free pass you cheating asshat. Love you. Expect random texts & probably a drunk dial or twelve. You did this to yourself. You're not invited so don't bother. Have fun at work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize