my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Randomize
