And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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