She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Randomize
