I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
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