what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
I won't apologize to a one balled man
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
Randomize
