How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
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