So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Randomize