hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Randomize
