it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
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