I'm laying in your front yard are you home
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
